Is adventure in your bones? Is it in your blood? Is it in the very essence of your being? Then like me, you crave the most worldly of treasures, and handiest of tools. That’s why regular gifts just won’t do. Who needs socks?!?! I know I don’t. Not when you’re knee deep in the Amazon River wrestling a giant Anaconda! That’s why I’ve compiled this list: The Adventurer’s Holiday Treasures. Whether you’re swinging from a vine in Borneo, or being chased by marauders on a run away mining cart in Panama, these items will bring you luck or help you get out of a sticky situation.
What’s more manly than being able to open a bottle, tighten some hex bolts, drive some screws, open some cans, and also open some letters and boxes at the same time? Nothing that’s what! This is one MANLY multitool. The only downside to this tool is that it has a two-inch ruler. Who in the wild world of sports goes around measuring things that are only two inches long? Ninjas maybe, but not Manly Men. Get it here.
Tired of smelling like a fairy princess after showering from that damn soap your wife buys? No more! This hand made leather soap will leave you fresh, clean, and smelling like tanned rawhide. Stop cleaning your kibbles and bits with your Grandma’s potpouri and start scrubbing down with a man’s soap. And watch out, these soap bars a big! Get it here.
Keep your kids from breaking all your stuff in the game room with this gruesome tarantula. Have it guard the doorway. Tell your kids it’s still alive and just waiting to break through its glass box and jump directly onto their faces! This beast used to eat whole birds for dinner, and with the right coaxing you can make your kids think it will eat them too. Don’t have kids? Well man up and make some! Until then, this tarantula will still look pretty cool in your bachelor pad. Get it here.
Ah, the Adventurer’s best friend, The Bull Whip. On the outside an antiquated weapon, but for those who know, it contains a whole cornucopia of uses. Swing over too-far-to-leap gorges, snatch pistols from people 10 feet away, use as an impromptu set of reigns for your stolen getaway horse. The uses are endless! Get it here.
Clip your new bullwhip to your hip with this slick simple bullwhip holster. Don’t be the Dainty Dan who carries his whip around like a purse. Strap it down, cinch it up and get back to Adventuring! Get it here.
Looking for a conversation piece at your next poker night? We’ve got the answer for you. Museum quality dinosaur Skulls! When you’re down on your chips, slap this baby down on the table and go all in. Tell them you dug it out of your backyard or bought if off a trade merchant in Burma. With this piece, you’ll be the Alpha Male in no time. Get it here.Read More!